Two + Three funny things about Infosys : Part III

4) Infosys Buildings : If you are not Infoscion, please click on this google search result link : Infosys building images before proceeding. Oh, BTW the image of dual snake like Infosys building in Dubai, that is just an internet rumour. At least, I hope so.

When the Al Qaueda pilots said, "But How will we find the buildings?" Osama said, I am sorry about the mistake, Osama (late) said "Get your ass up there and aim for the tallest buildings. And you! Can you draw Pentagon? You can't miss these from up in the sky."
Thus the course syllabus of postmodern architecture became just two chapters : rectangular Buildings, More rectangular buildings that cannot be spotted from sky.

So the world was shocked when NRN assembled a conference of international reporters and told them (after gesturing the orchestra to play the dramatic music score of Beethovan fifth symphony) "Wait! I need to take a deep breath here." He took a  deep breath and gestured again to the orchestra and then said, "I want buildings that can be spotted from sky. Pyramids, Rhomboids, and, and ..."(the music was in a crescendo indicating rising tension), he looked around and saw a crushed paper which he held high in his raised hand, "and not one but three buildings like this!"

The cymbals crashed and the cofounders clapped like crazy. The world gasped because they had just heard in CNN that Bush had fainted after choking on a pretzel and John Major had announced his support if Bush wanted to make a retaliatory strike against Sadam.

But the CIOs of the fortune five million companies read about the pyramid buildings and said, "All right! All right! We will give you another maintenance contract. We will come and tour the campus. But I swear to GOD, I am not going to plant one more tree!" And it worked fine too with Infosys because they were cutting tress to build tree shaped buildings.

The following lines are taken from the revised coursed syllabus of postmodern architecture after the revival led by Infosys buildings.

The spot-it-easy-from-sky architectural style reached its zenith in Mysore campus of Infosys where if you are on the road within the campus you are just lost. You have got to be on sky to find out how to go to the destination that you want to go. Hence this kind of architecture got its name Big Picture Architecture or You-are-walking-the-wrong-way architecture.

This style is exemplified by the following rules
a) All roads should be curved so people should never know which direction they are heading
b)Buildings should be built on slopes so if you enter in the ground floor on one side you exit on the second floor in the other side.
c)Have rooms but no doors.
d)If there is a door to a room, then conceal it.
e)Have loooooong corridors that will connect even loooooonger corridors
f)If you have found the shortest way to connect two buildings then try harder.
g)If you have designed a square room or building then design again.

Suggested Exercises
1. Who decides when the modern architecure style and post modern architecture starts? How exactly do they decide?
2. Have you seen the two snake like buildings on Internet? What do they look like?
3. How can you make the clients pay for this BEEP?

5) People involved in even more meaningless tasks than the ones cleaning the pebbles: When I see the folks at Quali..(My lawyer says that if I write one more letter after 'i' I might never get employed in Infosys again. Worse, I might even get sued. So...)

5 again)Appraisal and Balanced score card : Some people with unbalanced mind at H..(My lawyer is whispering again)

5 once again) 360 degree feedback : Well, To those who wanted 360 degree feedback, I always say let's start with 180 degree. Just turn aro...(My lawyer is wildly gesticulating now.)

All right, I am out of ideas now. See you in the next post.

If you liked this post, please consider for subscribing to my posts by email.

if you are an Indiblogger, You may want to check out the posts I submitted for Indiblogger contests like Take flight with color and You've got iPhone? Guess what I've got . Please consider promoting the posts if you like them. I would really appreciate it.