It is time to be free!

I love those huge electronic shops in malls. I go from aisle to aisle studying the merits, demerits of each and every item on display. The sales persons never bother me because they know I can be real brutal.

But something strange happened the other day.
"Do you like Samsung Tablet? It's the best, sir." The new sales guy jumped on me hoping for some sales commission.  I had to cut him to size. This kind of optimism did no one any good.

"So... Tablet PC is a laptop with smaller screen, lesser power and no keyboard. Is that right?"
 I asked him innocently.



"No! It is a thinner, lighter device for on the go." He corrected me.
"On the go! I never go! Never. Ever! That's why I have something called house. To put the stuff that I want. Italian leather sofa, LCD TV, Surround Sound, I have everything I want right in my house!  Where will I go? Why will I go?"

The sales guy looked crestfallen. I moved in for the kill.
"Okay! So why do you say Samsung tablet is the best."
The salesperson walked right into the trap. Boy! You should have seen the glow on his face.
"It is thinner, lighter,faster than any other tablet, Sir!"
"What! Thinner by less than a gram! Lighter by 6 mm. A shade faster. Is that why it is the best?"
The salesperson looked like a road kill. But he made one last ditch effort.
"You seem like a very knowledgeable person..."
"Of course, I am. I have been in IT for fifteen years."
"Would you like to talk to Samsung TAB?"
"What?"
"She will exclusively talk to discerning customers like you." He gestured to someone at the back of the store.

The screen shimmered slightly and out came..... Samsung TAB! Reading the technical specs and seeing the video is one thing. But seeing a person in flesh and blood is.. Boy! I tell ya! She is the fairest, and the slickest of them all.  Her skin, that rich tone, those curves!

"Listen! I am not an ON-THE-GO person. I don't need you."
 I put up a brave front as she glided towards me.
"I see! A designer house where the carpet and the walls match, right!" Her voice! It was so clear and real. She must have had those great surround speakers. A complete multimedia girl, I told myself.
"Is it Nerolac enamel rich finish paint?" TAB asked with an hint of approval.
"Yeah! The Saif Ali Khan one." I said sheepishly.


"Papa,look. I have drawn you and Mom fighting." My two year old kid shouted from across the store. He had a box of crayons in his hand. On the white store wall he had drawn two disfigured circles! Stick hands were poking each others eyes.

"Wow! Doesn't it look like a cave painting? Is he two years,four months and six days old?" TAB asked inquisitively.
"How did you know?"
"That was the mental faculty of cave men. It's all in my digital library - Reader's Hub."
"So my son is going to do drawings.. on walls?"
"Lots of them. For next two years. On the Nerolac enamel rich finish painted walls."
I was feeling slightly dizzy."I need..."
"A drink? There is a bar around the corner." TAB said intuitively.
"Will you join me? I know you will have lot of work."
"It might come as a surprise to you. But I can multitask. The only tablet to do so." She beamed.

There is nothing that can cool down a man like a chilled beer and a pair of sympathetic ears.
"You see! You are always on the go. Sometimes you wanna, but most of the times you havta." TAB said as she sipped her beer.
"How come you are so intelligent?"
"I told you! Reader's Hub. I don't want to brag about it. But it is the best digital library around."
"Can I be frank with you?"
"Men swear that I am their best friend."
"Well... I love my son. But of late.... he is so energetic. Pulling, pushing, breaking things. I keep him in Children's park in the apartment complex all the time just to safe keep my house.
"Oh! Great outdoors, Safe ingates." She smiled.
"But children's park is a brutal place for grown ups." I said
"The see-saws, slides, merry-go-round are five sizes smaller for you."
I smiled. She was funny.

"Seriously! I can't get any work done. What do I do?"
"Get a Tablet!"
"What?"
"They can go with you to places where no laptop has ever gone - toilets, food courts, parking lots. Trust me, With a two year old, these are the only places to work. I have Polaris office suite, connectivity."
"It's not all about work."
"Sure! Catch up with your college friends who are in the children's park of their own apartments with my SocialHub - the melting pot of emails, tweets, status messages."

She was right. I needed a Tablet. But there was one small thing. I didn't want to break her heart. But I had to.
"Listen! I can't buy you. You are the new kid in town. People will talk behind me, if I buy you."
Strangely she didn't seem affected by my comment at all.
"Would you like to see those comparison tables? Metrics as color coded rows, contenders as columns. "
"I have seen them all. I know you are the best. But you got to admit.. it is just couple of points here and there."
"I know. But I am the best."
"It is necessary but not sufficient condition."
"I see." She said still smiling.

We sipped beer quietly for sometime. Any one can walk into the bar and pick us right out - a couple about to break up. The silence was excruciating.

"So you are the one who gives food to your son?"
"Damn!"
"And you are a south Indian."
"You are kidding me. How did you do that?"
"It is elementary. I have a super resolution camera and a dual core Tegra2 processor that can do fast pattern recognition. And.. and you have curd rice stain in your T.shirt."
"Please.. Don't tell anybody this."
"Oh! Don't worry. More men than you think feed their kids. It is harder than many of the man's jobs out there anyway."
"Tell me about it."
"I just did." We both laughed. We were really hitting it off.
"How do you feed him? What's your trick? "
I looked around before whispering, "Romanius, Palisade Guardian."
"Really!" TAB asked in surprise.
"Yeah! Kids love Flash games. They will clean their plate in a second."
"I love Flash too. Do you know who doesn't like Flash?"
"Yeah! What's up with that? How am I going to feed my kid? Are they crazy?"
"No! they are not crazy. But they are.. they are like our fathers."

I took a big gulp from the mug the moment I heard the word father. When I wanted to buy new jeans for the first day of my college my father said, "Nonsense! We went to college in bell bottoms. And that's what you will go in." Boy! That really got me pissed. So I said... "Can it be in blue at least?" That is the thing with fathers. No matter how much you are pissed  with your father, you can't do anything because you are dependent on them. That is, till you start earning.

And Samsung TAB, she was right. Steve Jobs is the mother of all... fathers! The Grand Daddy! He can say things like,
"I will not support flash!",
"You can't download directly to iPad. Use your iTunes."
"Of course, you can only use the apps that I certify."
We went along with him because we were dependent on him. Let's face it, he had the only tablet that's worth buying for a long time.

But times have changed! I looked at the TAB in front of me with open standard HoneyComb. She is thinner, lighter, faster and better. But more importantly she listens to me and works for me not for my father.

"Don't you think it is time to tell your father, I will do what I want to do." She asked me. Her left hand sought and held mine. I looked deep into her eyes for a long time trying to make up my mind.

Finally I said, "You are right. Cheers! It is time to be free." I raised my mug.
"Cheers! It is time to TAB." She said and raised her mug.

This is an entry for Samsung Galaxy TAB contest of Indiblogger. You can watch the recorded video of Samsung Galaxy TAB below, if you had missed the live coverage in this blog.



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